Oh, I'm tired....

I now realize why people go to Vegas...

Why almost every couple I've seen has the same idea in the beginning about how to do their wedding with the three S's:

Small
Simple
Special

And, how it turns into it's own animal with every single person having their own opinion; family members taking complete control of decisions, and the couple looking back as if a movie is being played before them of "This is Your Wedding: It No Longer Belongs to You". I've reached a point where I had to let go. I've reached a point where I had to have a good cry. I've reached a point where I realize that none of this is really important...the important thing is that at the end of a stressful day or moment or more appropriately WEDDING, Mimmo and I can look at each other and laugh, cry (me!), be upset (he!), and find understanding, compassion, love and consolation in each other. I love him, He loves me...that's what's important. I've reached a point today where my last request is...I just really need to dance on my wedding! I don't care anymore!

Of course I care, but I mean that at the end of the day (thank you, Nora Fitzgerald) maybe what remains small, simple, and special is just what we have. Let me all catch you up to speed:

Our original Small.Simple.Special idea: We have an outdoor wedding at Baia, Emilio's restaurant that he built overlooking the sea. We enjoy the view of the 2 islands, eat outdoors, dance, drink, and be merry with a small group of our closest friends and family. We do it in September which is one of our favorite months.

We have a celebration in San Francisco with the rest of my friends and family and some of Mimmo's f&f who are in the states and can't make it for the Italian wedding. We celebrate on a cruiser that goes around the s.f. bay with food, music, drinks, dancing, and spectacular views. We do it in May which is our other favorite month. (so far, this remains untouched and intact until I'm sure someone will try to break my balls about this too down the road...there's still time.).

Outcome: My mom is unhappy, Mimmo's mom is unhappy that we're not getting married in the church. Perhaps by the grace of their God, we find out in Monte di Procida that outdoor civil weddings are not allowed (as in much of the rest of italy) and that only the mayor (see Sant'Anna posting below) could marry us. We decide to get married in the Catholic Church in Bacoli with Padre Carmine (a cool priest). We have our reception at Emilio's.

The reaction: Mimmo's mom is thrilled we're getting married in the church. They're not so happy that we're doing the reception at Emilio's (refer to They're Breaking My Balls posting below). My mom is also happy we're getting married in the church vs. having a civil wedding, but now she wants us to ALSO get married in the Greek Orthodox Church. I actually went to Naples before she told me this (not like I didn't already know how she'd feel!) to talk to the priest there in the Greek Orthodox Church about getting married there or in the Catholic Church. I was hoping that we could have both priests do it together. This is not possible. He tells me that in Italy it's better to get married in the Catholic Church first and then the Greek Orthodox Church after. Otherwise, we'd still have to do a civil wedding first before getting married in the Greek Orthodox Church in Italy. Are you still with me? This is getting complicated!

The next step: Ok, we've decided that we'll get married in the Catholic Church in Bacoli, eat at Emilio's after. 2 days later, we'll go to Naples and have the Greek wedding with just our immediate families and go to a Greek taverna there after. We'll stick to our California plan for May. OH MY GOD, YES, WE'VE GONE FROM OUR SMALL.SIMPLE.SPECIAL WEDDING TO GETTING MARRIED 3 TIMES!

The ball-breaking: Emilio's. Emilio's. Emilio's. Emilio's is the only thing of ours that remains and the only thing that they're still trying to pull out from under our feet. We go yesterday to get the invitations made and Mimmo's mom calls me right before and says "Lisa, don't put the name of the restaurant on the invitation,". I will not even get into this story as it's too fresh and too complicated, but I really understood that the truth of the matter is, we really can't do the reception at Emilio's. I've let it go and just surrendered. Mimmo feels bad. Really bad. We spend last night with some friends, lamenting our wedding-planning woes and find Emilio there too. Mimmo feels really bad to tell him about our situation, but Emilio has already understood and gives us a recommendation for another restaurant that we could eat well, make a bella figura, and would still fit our style. Now all of the friends who were consoling us in the process decide to weigh in their opinions about where the other restaurant should be. Me: "It's getting late,". Mimmo: "Time to go home.". I'm sure they were still up in the piazza discussing it after we left.

Ok, PEOPLE, so some of you reading this ARE THESE PARENTS and some of you reading this ARE these wedding survivors. Can no one see what a ridiculous, I mean RIDICULOUS thing this becomes? I am yearning for a bi-lingual Dr. Phil right now (oh, mammamia, did I really just say that?) to whip everybody's asses into shape....

Now, I just want to dance on my wedding day.